Being asked for texting advice, almost on a daily basis, is a good indicator that my fellow, male compatriots are grasping the true reality of our modern life. Calling chicks and asking them out over the phone is almost completely dead. These days, there are barely any times when calling a chick under 30, to sort out a date, is the right move.
As I’ve said before, having game is about molding perfectly with what society throws at us, being a reflection of culture if you will – refusing to text girls because you prefer calling just means that your level of game is crippled and you’re unable to mold with what modern society demands.
Because everyone seems to be “busy” – calling someone on the phone when they least expect it may actually be seen as rude. The right kind of texting allows you to literally spend less time and energy scoring chicks as opposed to the nerve-racking and time consuming process of “phone game”. To put this even more simply, by embracing these social norms, modern women are now making men put less effort into banging them.
If you’re still unable to adapt to the circumstances there are 2 very rare occasions in which calling a girl might actually be more beneficial: if she knows you, thus avoiding the awkward introduction of who you are and why you are calling; if she personally said “Call Me” when she gave you her number. But, even in these scenarios, you will most certainly NOT LOSE out on a potential bang if you text her instead.
Guide To Texting:
Because texting is a far more complicated subject, today we’ll be looking at how to text a chick when you want to ask her out, these should usually be the first few texts that you send after you’ve got her number at a venue somewhere.
Note: This is typical but I’m going to mention it anyway. Make sure you leave some subjects opened before you ask for her number thus giving you something to talk about when you text her; make sure remember stuff she said about herself, thus giving you more things to say to her while texting.
Important: Do not ask her out with the first text.
So many guys do this and they never get a response because it’s just too soon. You can’t demand this from her, not yet anyway – at this point in time, your whole focus should be getting her to reply not getting her straight into bed.
“Hey sexy/gorgeous/beautiful/babe/[compliment], was soo great to meet you last night/I had such a good/great time last night (over ecstatic introduction of how you met). Want to go out this weekend?”
Do you not see how this text makes you come out as a needy wuss? This is what most guys on this planet do. The only time when you can ask her out with the first text is when you almost banged her the night before – this is also known as a super solid number. In every other scenario, wait to get a response first then, ask her out.
Your first text should always obey these rules:
- Do not put her on a pedestal (calling her sexy, gorgeous, babe, giving kisses etc)
- Do not ask her out
- Make it easy for her to reply back
To make things even easier for you I’ve made a 5 step structure that you can always use when “creating” your first text.
Step 1. Start message with: “Hey name/nickname”. Nickname should be based on something that either happened or was discussed in your initial face to face conversations. Humor is always good to break the ice and will almost always get her to reply back.
Step 2. Bring up something that went very well during your initial conversation. This can be something you both really connected over, something emotional, something that made you both laugh, or something that you know 100% she enjoyed talking to you about.
Step 3. Assume you already know what she’s doing based on what you’ve discussed in your initial conversation and say it to her. This will get you a response if you’re right but it will also get you a response if you’re wrong, either way, you get a response.
Step 4. Ask a specific question that she has to respond to. No question mark in your text is still enough of a reason for her to ignore you.
Step 5. End with your name/nickname that will remind her of who you are and where you met etc. She should already know who you are due to step 1-2-3 but still add it so she has no reason to say she didn’t know the number etc.
“Hey frisky Katie, are you still studying for that big exam on Thursday? I bet you’re in your pajamas right now, watching Breakfast at Tiffany’s and drinking some of that sweet red wine… Alex from [Venue Name]”
Quick explanation: she was incredibly frisky so we joked about that all night, used it in the text. She told me about her big exam, used it in the text and made it as a question. She told me one of her favorite thing to do is to watch classic movies in her pajamas whilst drinking some red wine, used it as an assumption. Basically I used all I could from our conversations into the first text and I did not ask her out.
Important: You need to gauge how into you she is.
When she replies back, this is the perfect time to see how into you she actually is. This tells you if she’s worth more effort or not.
Let’s say you asked her “How was your weekend?” – Because you couldn’t come up with anything else.
If she says: “it was ok” – It’s quite evident that she isn’t all that into you.
If she says: “Hey, yeah it was quite all right, didn’t do much on Sunday and now I’m back to work L, how about you?” – She’s obviously interested so keep going.
Asking Her Out:
You need to follow 2 very important rules when asking her out.
- Don’t be boring – don’t be like every other Dick and Joe that she’s met time and time again.
- Give clear details – Girls hate making the decisions about a date, you’re the one with the cohones so man up! Sell her on your specific date idea and when she’s into it, confirm it with clear time and location.
Boring, unclear examples that most guys actually send: “So, you want go out this weekend? / I was wondering if you’d like to go out this weekend?” – boooring!
You: “Listen, I still want to talk classic movies (your common interest), knock back a few Cubans (the other thing you’ll be doing there – drinking) and watch you being frisky. How does this Wednesday at [Venue] sound? (always better to ask during the week since she might already have plans for the weekend)”
Her: “haha yeah, that sounds fun!”
You: “Cool, meet me at [Venue/Some common point before venue] at X time”
Being in control and giving clear details works like a charm. I was once trying to get this girl out and she wasn’t too keen on the idea, even though I was gently pushing it for like 2 days. I didn’t care so I just told her I’m going out anyway. On the night she asks me, “What are you up to?” when she already knew I was about to go out with my pack of dudes. In any case, I replied: “I’m still going to [venue], you’ve got 1 more hour to get ready.” And yep, she came, alone, we banged, she came, amazing!
Important: Make sure she doesn’t flake and always have a back-up plan in case she does.
Most guys send needy texts asking the chick if it’s still on. Don’t be that guy, assume it is and just say something about it. “Mmmm … cubans” if you agreed to go out for cocktails. If no reply/flaking make sure you have a back-up plan. There’s nothing worse than your whole night to depend on a girl you’ve barely met, sitting at home and waiting for a reply to see if you should jump in the shower. Always take her out on days you know you can do something else in case she flakes. I use Wednesdays because that’s also ladies night at another good venue in the area – but this is a totally different subject matter.
Remember: these “texting skills” will only get you to see her again. You still need some proper game if you expect things to get physical…
This is the sort of stuff I discuss on my blog and in the free eBook I give out. If you want to increase your success with women, visit ThePlayerGuide.com – a place where the “dating” mindset is thrown out the window in favor of more direct and fruitful methods of meeting and seducing women.