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How Not Going On Dates Can Land You a Girlfriend



I will be very blunt here.. Dates should be an exclusive privilege to girls that actually deserve it. Their worth is established by a number of things:

1. She is having sex with you
2. The sex is good
3. You have feelings for her
4. She’s interested in you, not your money/friends/influence etc

When a girl ticks all of these points you can take her out on dates as she now deserves it.

Ok, so let’s see why you shouldn’t take them on dates and what to do instead.

Well first most important reason would be that fact that EVERYONE else takes her on dates. How are you any different from all the other douche bags that are buying her dinner, drinks, or whatever?

Exactly, you’re not different.

I’ve met many girls who kept going on dates because the guy was paying for her dinner, she went out with this other guy because he was always buying her drinks. I’m sure you have at least one female friend that exploits a guy. Don’t be him, show her that you’re different, show her that from the start.

Make your intentions obvious from the start and never let her take advantage of you. Yes women can take advantage of men and the saddest part is most of these men don’t even realize it!

The other reason would be money…why should you spend 50 pounds (here in the UK) on a dinner date when you won’t even know if she’s going to have sex with you? We all know that taking her out, paying for dinner, doesn’t necessarily result in sex…it all bows down to how you make her feel.

So then I ask you. Why should you buy dinner only to rely on your own skills on making her feel good, when you could do the same in any other activity?

You might ask, well girls want to go on dates, how do we get around that? It’s very simple, you don’t go on dates – you GET together!

Call her up/text her/send her an email and tell her you want to get together. She might think it’s a date or whatever she wants to think but, you don’t care, you know exactly what’s going to happen. When you ask her to “get together” and not really asking her out on a date, it also increase her positive response rate for 2 very important reasons: it’s different and she’s not obligated to do anything since it’s not a date.

In these circumstances, there’s no pressure, if there’s no pressure she’s more likely to feel good and if she feels good you’ve got her in the bag!

So what sort of activities fall into get togethers?

In a post I wrote last week, called “How to Be a Player When You’ve Got No Money”, there was a section on how to deal with dating when you don’t have any money.

Well even if you are the richest guy in the world you should still be doing things like that.

So what are we talking about here:

Take her out for a walk in the park – to this day this is one of my favorite activities. You walk around the park, talk, make her feel good, even grab an ice cream/coffee from the closest shop (don’t pay for her). There’s absolutely no pressure on this activity and that instantly loosens her up.

Rent bikes and go cycling together.

Do sports together.

Take her to free events – yes it’s full of them around your location. Do a Google search and find out. Not only will you be cost free on this but you will be doing something she’s probably never done before.

These are things like art galleries, amateur theatre, live bands etc. She will enjoy this more than you can imagine.

(Side note: Always end whatever is that you’re doing before she does. If you end it while she’s feeling good, she had a good time. If you let it drag on until she ends it (when she’s no longer feeling good) she’ll have a bitter taste in her mouth and it’s all downhill from there…)

Make her part of your world – This is another one of my favorites. This is actually how you can make a girl fall in love with you. It’s a simple process that many of us men do without realizing but here are the details.

After you do a couple of the activities above it’s probably a good time to have sex with her. It should work, usually works if you kept her feeling good. With that sorted it’s time to make her part of your world.

This is so good, I’m getting exited writing about it. Bear in mind you never took her on a date yet, also make sure you take her to your place when you have sex.

Now that you’ve finished (sex) you can either throw her out of your house or, let her stay the night.

What I usually do is give her a pair of my boxers and a T-shirt and get her into the living room. I’ve got some wine and a nice shaggy white carpet we can sit on. I put a movie in, let’s say Breakfast at Tiffany’s and we sit there talking and watching.

You tell me, what girl doesn’t want to sit on a white shaggy carpet drinking wine while watching Breakfast at Tiffany’s?

I’ve got some cool roommates too (all girls), so they sometimes hang with us.

What I’m doing here, is making her part of my world. These are things she does with me that she will never ever have the chance to do with anyone else.

If she stays the night, even better, she’ll be part of my world in the morning. I wake up and, because I eat “healthy” – I cook eggs and bacon. Guess what? She get’s the same; she’s literally experiencing part of my life.

Girls die for stuff like this and this is the sort of things that make her fall in love with you.

It gets even better, if I’ve got stuff to do and she’s got the day off, I take her with me. I nicely ask her to come with me to the car parts store to buy a new bulb for my car, we have a nice drive, talk etc we get the bulb have a coffee somewhere and then I take her home.

And do you know the good part? I’ve never been on a date with this girl.

But do you know the best part? Next time I want to see her, I just asked her if she wants to come to my place and because she had such a nice time…she WANTS to!

Ok, so maybe I took this whole thing a bit too far but you must get the idea. Dates are bad and, I’ve just proved that NOT going on a date with a girl will actually make her fall in love with you.

So next time you get this girl’s number, don’t ask her on a date, tell her you want to “GET TOGHETER” and do any of the activities mentioned above.

Alex Matlock is an expert in dating and woman psychology. Apart from working on his PHD in Social Psychology and writing for Guys Gab, he also owns - a place where the "dating" mindset is thrown out the window in favor of more direct (and fruitful) methods of meeting and seducing women.

1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Francesco

    April 30, 2012 at 3:41 pm

    I’ll be rereading this.

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